N8N first stumbled across Major Blunder at Puketaha school during the re-imagining of the Battle of Hastings. The good Major argues that the Serious Business of Life should be leavened with joy and fun, as well as the certain knowledge that having slain the Enemies of the Queen, God Bless Her, today, one can go forth and do it all over again tomorrow.
Here he explains exactly why he does it.
One of the early questions often asked about Pacifist Battling is, “Why do you do it?” – an often less than subtle reference to one having the appearance of an adult (wonderful what a peppering of grey hair can achieve), and therefore why would one willingly make a fool of oneself … in public?!
Perhaps the simplest answer is that, like stand-up/slap-stick comedians from the Vaudevillian era, is that one wishes to be the centre of attention. Or that one lives for the audience reaction, that rare drug without which no performer’s day is complete. And despite being obvious answers or perhaps because of that, neither one really fits the bill.
For oneself, the driving raison d’être for fighting Pacifist Battles, preferably in front of a huge audience, is that they are FUN!
The performance aspects certainly appeal to the frustrated thespian in one’s soul (learning lines has never been one’s strength); the costumes for Off Duty events appeal to the desire to look one’s best in a social situation; the meeting with other members of the broader performing community is certainly enjoyable, as is the socialising with friends, the being different, the marching upstream against a flow of trenchant modernism-at-all-costs.
And all of that truth aside, there, sitting firmly at the heart of every battle where one gets covered in flour, mud, sweat (that would be perspiration for the Honorary Chaps), leaves, lawn clippings and anything else that happens along is the eight-ton bull elephant in the room – F-U-N!
But Life should be taken seriously one has been told on occasion, and certainly that needs to be true in its place. However, this Serious Business called Life should also be leavened with joy, FUN, laughter and the sure and certain knowledge that having slain the Enemies of the Queen, God Bless Her, today, one can go forth and do it all over again tomorrow with the same people, on the same site and have an equally enjoyable but totally different experience.
One’s Imperial Service began in April 1985, serving seven and a half months in the 4th Lady Masseys before founding the local Regiment in November of the same year, so 27 years, and a few months to date, for the total bag of some 247 engagements all told.
The last seven years have seen a new iteration of things Regimental as we present historical epics to schools, something never dreamt of in the early days.
So Yes, Gentle Reader, one will continue to have FUN all over New Zealand for the foreseeable future and quite probably well beyond it, because we never know quite what will happen next … now do we?
One remains, as ever, your most obedient servant –
Major Blunder, Officer Commanding, Fifth Waikato Dragoons Regiment, Northern Command, Alf’s Imperial Army. Humour in Uniform.